A few years ago Kim Beggs asked me, "What's your goal with music? Where do you want to be with it in five years?" I didn't really have a good answer for her at the time. I told her that I knew some of the things I didn't want. Being a mom, I knew that touring wasn't really in the cards for me. Other than that, I was just doing it for fun, because it felt good, and because it's exciting to me to keep learning and to keep getting better. Years later, I still don't really have a good answer to the question. I am a fan of goal-setting, so I'm not entirely directionless. Last summer I wanted to record a demo. I did that. This year, I'd like to record another six tunes and have a complete album. I've picked a theme, picked the songs, talked to the producer, mentally prepared for writing the grant application... though I've yet to do the actual proposal writing. But do I have an overarching goal? I quit my job so that I could find better balance in my life, so I could be a better mom and still pursue the thing that gives my life fire. Given the chance, would I like to be as famous as, say, Diana Krall or Norah Jones or Stacey Kent? (How audacious of me to suggest such a thing, but hey, we're talking hypotheticals here, not probabilities.) Yesterday at the grocery store, the tabloid headlines screaming at me at the checkout were about Demi Moore's struggles with drugs and anorexia. In a few days, the paper tabloids will no doubt be screaming about the tragic death of Whitney Houston, just as the online ones are today. It seems that, as Jann Arden tweeted today, "fame has big sharp bloody teeth". So, what's the point, then? I ask myself that all the more these days, where winter's feeling like it's gone on too long, the calendar's packed a little too full, the to-do list too long, and I'm craving fresh air and sunshine. Perhaps I still don't have a long-term goal. I'm still just trying to keep that fire burning, working my butt off to keep learning and keep getting better, playing as much as I can with musicians I admire. I'm still struggling for balance in my life, to be a better mom while pursuing my passion. And for now, that's still enough. For now, I don't have a "goal" to win a Juno, or sing in front of 6,000 people. Thing is, I can look back at where I was when I had that conversation with Kim, and I can see how far I've come. I wear a lot of hats in my life; music has to fit into my life, not the other way around. The point is passion, and being the best me I can be.